The importance of fear and uncertainty in making a breakthrough
As I see it, a lot of people want change but don’t know how to reconcile the fear and uncertainty. In my last post we spoke about the many ways in which your life gives you the message…you know… the polite message called…
‘Wake up…it’s time to change!’ We also know that humans have more of a tendency to wait until things get really murky before they ‘do something about it’, and that’s partly because of the nature of the old brain to want to fix that which is broken as opposed to improve that which is working well…
You see, the idea is to “enter the silence within”, so you can hear the whisperings in the wind that lead you to the small incremental changes you can make in your life that gently guide you to a new order. And that’s always easier than waiting for the hurricane to arrive!
But what if the hurricane has already arrived and you know you’re up against it…then what then?
The good news
All the research (and my experiences back this up), say that when human beings are up against it, that’s when they make the hugest leaps in consciousness…the brave decisions that unfold new purpose, new destiny and new metaphors in their life….The f*** it moments that produce extraordinary “Go for it’ness”!
And this is actually the point where things become less complicated and far clearer….It’s where a person can enter… ‘The Ocean of Calm Within’. But on the way along that road, the scenery isn’t so pretty, and it often forces folks back the way they came, back to familiarity and back to the old order of things.
So, what can you expect along the way before you reach the Ocean of Calm Within?
1). Confusion
Too many questions, too many thoughts, not knowing which way to turn, which path to follow? Confusion lets a person know that they are challenging the old form of their life, and that’s a good thing. The map of the territory is being revised in some way and one can feel a little lost, albeit temporarily.
2). Fear
Afraid to step in to Uncertainty and yet afraid to stay as you are…this kind of double edge fear keeps a person momentarily stuck and can be frustrating, but once again the traveller is headed further down the road and closer to the Ocean of Calm, but subjectively it seems miles off.
The Breakthrough!
If a person stays in the discomfort and uncertainty long enough without running from it, they can make a genuine life breakthrough! At the point of breakthrough here is what you can expect to find. So what I’m saying is fear and uncertainty are on the whole not to be avoided, they can be a fertile ground for making a breakthrough.
3). A deep desire to live, change and be well.
When a person hit’s their rock bottom and confronts their fear, they often find something really beautiful, tucked away in some unknown dark corner of the soul is a small and unyielding flame… a deep feeling that rises from the inside…the feeling to ‘want to live, to want to be well and to want to be happy! You see… no matter what a person has been through in their life, the core of their self always remains intact…and it’s there when you need it most.
4). Things get Clear…you find the binary choice that leads to a place of calm resolve
When a person finds this ‘deep feeling’, that’s when things start to become really clear. It’s where the voice inside says…
“Things are either going to go up from here or down from here”
And for once, instead of feeling panicked by this kind of predicament and self admission, strangely it produces a calmness, an acceptance of the impending change…a true moment of choice and personal freedom…The freedom demonstrates that a person is “Unconsciously” abandoning the old expectations and rules they had lived by in order to determine their worth.
5). A Spontaneous Shift in Values
I say spontaneous, but it could have taken years to get to, but still, a life shift happens in a blink of any eye. At this stage, while feeling a sense of calm…a person suddenly surrenders the idea of what they had placed importance on and elevates thought to a higher value. By higher value I mean something that orchestrates everything below it. An example of this shift could be; going from career to health, or family expectations to personal happiness, or from money to purpose.
6). Openness and Humility
This is what comes next, a true openness to change, a willingness to try everything that could help and the humility to say (and feel good about saying)… “I can’t do this on my own I need guidance…”. This is when listening penetrates the heart and everyone and everything can become part of the change. Possibilities are seen everywhere and when a person looks at them…surprise surprise…there’s no fear! Instead there is curiosity, and even excitement about what’s possible.
7). A new path opens up
So, in the old knowledge there’s this saying… “When the Student is ready, the teacher/s will appear”. Well it’s even more profound then that, because when the heart and mind is truly open we are beyond the rules and the fear we placed on ourselves, and moments of synchronicity…unexplainable coincidences start showing up…people, the words in a song…staring right at a bill board in the traffic that means something to you. If you are getting these, it’s the surest sign you are on the right path for some higher purpose to unfold in your life and the only thing you need to ask yourself is, does this path have a heart? If it does, it’s your calling; it WILL transform your life. You can’t predict how, and so there is a little uncertainty and sometimes…
8). The old path comes calling…in a last bid to lure to the familiar
As you stand in the doorway of genuine ‘Newness’ in your life sometimes the old order makes one last call, some old inner voice, people’s thoughts and expectations, it can come in many forms. But remember at this point, all you need to do is step in to the uncertainty one tiny step at a time…commit to something new each day, try something out, especially when you don’t know where it will take you, because every time you do something genuinely new, it’s a creative act, and a creative act will illuminate the purpose and destiny inside you…it makes that inner flame grow and when that happens you’re always closer to finding out who you really can be!
And remember… “No matter what you think you are…You are always more than that”
Love…
Coach Ricky
